Life Coach: 3 tips to boost your luck

Life Coach: 3 tips to boost your luck

HARLINGEN, Texas (ValleyCentral) — Life Coach Grecia Karlsson says when you hear the word “luck” the first thing that comes to peoples’ minds is winning the lottery or becoming famous overnight.

However, Karlsson says the money and fame of these events are often short-lived. She wants to share with the public her 3 tips to boost your luck.


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Change Your Schedule Change Your Life

Change Your Schedule Change Your Life

At Change Your Schedule Change Your Life, we understand the importance of having a healthy, balanced schedule. We understand that life can be chaotic and unpredictable, but that doesn’t mean you have to stay stuck in an unfulfilling cycle. With a well-thought-out and organized schedule, you can make a change and find the perfect balance between work, leisure, and family time. Not only will this help you increase your productivity and reduce stress, but it will lead to a more fulfilling and happier life! Let us help you make that change today and reclaim your life.

We offer a variety of resources to help you create the perfect schedule. Our step-by-step guide will help you set goals, plan your days, and create a schedule that works for you. We also offer helpful tips and tricks on managing your time, prioritizing tasks, and creating a work-life balance. Our team of experts is here to help you every step of the way. We’re here to listen to your needs and goals and create a schedule that fits you and your lifestyle. Whether you’re juggling a full-time job, family, and leisure activities, or just need a little extra help, we’re here to help.

So, if you’re looking to create a healthier and more balanced life, then it’s time to make a change and create the perfect schedule. With Change Your Schedule Change Your Life, you can create a schedule that works for you and helps you live a happier, more productive life.

How to Start a Schedule for Lasting Change

Are you looking to make a lasting change in your life? You may have taken the first step by deciding to make a change, but without a proper plan, it can be difficult to stay on track. Developing a schedule for lasting change is a great way to make sure you stay on track and reach your goals.

Creating a schedule for lasting change may seem like a daunting task, but it doesn’t have to be. Start by breaking down the change you want to make into smaller, manageable goals. For example, if you want to start exercising more, focus on setting a goal to walk for thirty minutes three times a week. Once you have smaller, achievable goals, it will be easier to start implementing them into your daily life.

Once you have your goals set, it’s time to create a schedule that works for you. Think about the times when you have the most energy, and make sure to plan your activities around that. Also, make sure to build in some time for rest and reflection. This will help you stay motivated, and it will also give you the opportunity to reflect on how far you’ve come.

Creating a schedule for lasting change takes patience and perseverance. Don’t be discouraged if you don’t see results right away. It takes time to form new habits and to really see the changes you are making. Try to stay positive and remind yourself why you are making these changes.

Finally, give yourself rewards for reaching each goal. This could be a special treat, some extra time for yourself, or even a small token of appreciation. Celebrate your successes, no matter how small, and use them to motivate yourself to keep going.

Remember, change your schedule change your life. With a proper plan, you can create a schedule for lasting change and reach your goals.

 7 Tips for Sticking to a New Schedule 

Are you feeling overwhelmed and unorganized? Do you feel like your life is slipping out of your control? If so, implementing a new schedule may be the key to getting your life back on track. 

Having a strict schedule is often essential to leading a happy and organized life. It gives you structure, keeps you on task, and helps you stay focused on your goals. Establishing a new schedule can be difficult though, especially if you’re used to a more relaxed lifestyle. 

But don’t be discouraged! With a few simple steps and some dedication, you can make a new schedule that works for you and helps you reach your goals. 

Here are 7 tips for sticking to a new schedule and changing your life for the better: 

  1. Start Small: Trying to make too many changes at once can be overwhelming and can set you up for failure. Start by making small changes and build momentum over time.
  2. Make a Plan: Make a plan for each day that includes when you’ll wake up, when you’ll work, and when you’ll rest. The plan should also include time for exercise and activities that bring you joy.
  3. Prioritize Sleep: Getting enough sleep is essential to sticking to a new schedule. Try to get at least 7 hours of sleep each night so you can wake feeling refreshed and ready to tackle the day.
  4. Focus on Routine Tasks: Choose a few routine tasks that you’ll do every day. This might include checking emails, responding to messages, making calls, or writing a blog post.
  5. Set Boundaries: It’s important to set boundaries with yourself and others. This means setting limits on when work will start and end, and not overcommitting yourself.
  6. Make Time for Fun: Don’t forget to make time for activities that bring you joy. This could be a hobby, exercise, or simply spending time with friends and family.
  7. Track Progress: Make sure to track your progress and celebrate the small wins. This will help you stay motivated and encourage you to stay on track with your goals.

Making a new schedule and sticking to it is one of the best ways to change your life. With a bit of dedication and these 7 tips, you can create a schedule that works for you and helps you reach your goals. So, what are you waiting for? Change your schedule, change your life!

The Benefits of a Flexible Schedule 

A flexible schedule enables you to easily rearrange your day-to-day tasks, allowing for a more balanced lifestyle. Here are some of the primary benefits of embracing a flexible schedule:

Increased Productivity:

A flexible schedule allows you to customize your schedule to your needs and goals. For example, you can use your most productive hours to tackle challenging tasks and use your less productive hours to catch up on administrative duties. This optimized use of your time can lead to greater productivity and better overall results.

More Time for Self-Care:

Flexible scheduling offers you the opportunity to maximize your time and energy, allowing you to make time for yourself. Working long hours without breaks can lead to burnout and exhaustion, but with a flexible schedule, you can take time off to do activities that bring you joy, like going for a walk or getting a massage.

Improved Overall Quality of Life:

With a flexible schedule, you can create a better work-life balance. You’ll be able to spend more quality time with your family and friends, nurture your hobbies and interests, and pursue your passions. Achieving a proper work-life balance can increase your happiness and satisfaction, which can lead to better overall quality of life.

By embracing flexible scheduling, you can take control of your life and make the most of the time and energy available to you. With a flexible schedule, you can optimize your productivity, focus on self-care, and improve your quality of life. So, take the plunge and make the change. Change your schedule change your life.

How to Set Goals and Prioritize Your Time

If you’re feeling overwhelmed by your to-do list and your schedule, you’re not alone. We all struggle to find balance between work, family, and personal responsibilities. But, if you take the time to set goals and prioritize your time, you can make the most of your days and make progress towards your dreams.

Setting goals and prioritizing your time isn’t always easy, but it’s essential for success. Here are some tips to help you get started:

Get Clear on Your Goals:

The first step to setting goals and prioritizing your time is to identify what you want to accomplish. Take some time to think about what your long-term and short-term goals are. Write them down and break them down into achievable steps.

Prioritize Your Goals:

Once you’ve identified your goals, it’s time to prioritize them. Think about which ones are most important to you and order them accordingly. It can also be helpful to set deadlines for each goal. That way, you’ll be sure to stay on track.

Block Your Time:

Now that you know what your goals are, it’s time to start blocking out time to work on them. Make sure you’re realistic and don’t try to cram too much into one day. Set aside specific times each day where you can focus on your goals and stick to it.

Stay Organized:

Organization is key when it comes to setting goals and prioritizing your time. Make sure to keep your goal list, calendar, and to-do list all in one place. This will make it easier to stay on track and stay accountable to yourself.

Track Your Progress:

Finally, make sure to track your progress. This means recording your daily successes and failures so that you can look back and see where you’ve been and how far you’ve come. This will help keep you motivated and give you a better understanding of what needs to be done and when.

Change your schedule, change your life – that’s the mantra of goal setting and time management. Take the time to set goals, prioritize your time, and stay organized. It’s the best way to make sure you’re making progress towards your dreams and living the life you want.

Change Your Schedule Change Your Life

Tips and Strategies to Change Your Schedule Change Your Life

Do you ever feel like you’re stuck in an endless loop of the same mundane routine day after day? Many of us are, making us feel overwhelmed and worn down. Don’t worry – we’ve got you covered! The following tips and strategies will help you change your schedule, and in turn, change your life.

The first step in changing your routine is to assess your current schedule and figure out what works and what doesn’t. Write down everything you do on a daily basis, including daily obligations such as work or school, to-dos, errands and leisure activities. Once you have a better understanding of your day-to-day habits, use this information to help you organize your routine better.

A good place to start is by allocating a specific slot for each daily task. Set aside a time for work, errands, leisure activities, and personal time. And remember to factor in breaks – they are an essential part of a successful schedule.

Creating a daily to-do list is another great strategy. List everything you need to do, prioritize the most important tasks, and then break down each item into smaller pieces. This straightforward approach will help keep you organized and motivated throughout the day.

We all know that a daily workout is important for both physical and mental health. But, it’s hard to stick to a diet or exercise plan without a regular schedule. Try to find a time slot that fits your days and weeks, such as blasting inspirational tunes in the morning and dedicating at least 20 minutes to a guided programmed.

Creating a nightly schedule is also essential. Set a designated time when you promise yourself to shut off electronics, complete your nightly chores, and get ready for the next day. And it’s so important to make sure that you get enough sleep. Aiming for 7-8 hours every night is critical for sustained productivity during the day.

All of these tips and strategies are designed to help you create a schedule that is both realistic and manageable. Don’t forget to write down your tasks and goals and to reward yourself each time you complete something. Of course, it’s also important to stay flexible and don’t forget to give yourself some breathing room – life doesn’t happen on a rigid schedule! 

These are all helpful tips and strategies to change your schedule and change your life. So, take a moment to think about how you can make positive changes in your daily routine. Have the courage to step outside of your comfort zone and you’ll find that a positive change in your schedule truly will make a change in your life!

Practical Tips for Managing a Busy Life 

Are you struggling to stay on top of your day-to-day responsibilities? If so, it’s time to make a change. Managing a busy life doesn’t have to be overwhelming. All it takes is a few simple adjustments to your lifestyle and a little planning.

When it comes to efficiency and productivity, scheduling is key. Learning how to efficiently carve out time and make the most of it can truly help alleviate stress and make managing your busy life easier. Here are some practical tips to help you get your schedule in order and make your life run a little smoother.

  1. Prioritize: Make a list of your tasks and prioritize them according to importance. This will help you focus on the most important items first and save the less important tasks for later. It will also help prevent you from getting overwhelmed and keep you on track.
  2. .Plan Ahead: Don’t wait for time to just magically appear for you to do something. Take time each week to schedule out your tasks and the time you plan to accomplish each. By planning ahead, you’ll be able to identify the tasks that don’t necessarily have to be done right away, and save time.
  3. Focus on One Task at A Time: Multi-tasking can be tempting, especially when in a time crunch, but try to focus all of your energy and attention on one task at a time. This will help you stay focused and prevent your performance from being hindered by multitasking.
  4. Take Breaks: Breaks are essential for rest and rejuvenation. Make sure to take regular breaks throughout the day and don’t forget to give your mind and body time to reset and recharge.
  5. Delegate: You can’t possibly do it all yourself. Don’t be afraid to ask for help and delegate tasks if need be. This will free up some of your time to focus on the most important tasks.

Life is busy, but it doesn’t have to be overwhelming. With a few simple adjustments and practical tips, you can effectively manage your schedule and make the most of the time you have. Learning how to manage a busy life is essential for success and will help you stay focused, organized, and productive. Change your schedule, and change your life.

Conclusion

The key takeaway is that changing your schedule can bring positive changes to your life. Whether it’s setting aside time for yourself or making time for the important people in your life, it’s important to remember that changing your schedule can be a powerful tool for achieving a happier, more fulfilling life. So, take the time to reflect on your current routine and consider where you could make small changes that will have a big impact on your life. Change your schedule, change your life!

life coach for middle aged

Guide to Best life coach for middle aged

The journey to find the best life coach for middle aged adults isn’t easy, but it can be incredibly rewarding. Life coaches specialize in helping people create a plan to achieve their goals. They will provide guidance and support so that you can make positive changes in life and reach your peak of success.

If you’re struggling to make sense of life’s complexities, the pressure of competing responsibilities, or simply feel the need for a fresh perspective, you may want to consider working with a life coach. A life coach can help you to identify your goals and develop the strategies to reach them. At midlife, our relationships, career, and daily life can become overwhelming. The pressures of family, work, and health can keep us from living our best life and reaching our full potential. This is where having a life coach can be beneficial. A life coach can help you figure out the steps you need to take to realize your goals and bring balance back into your life.

We hope this guide has helped you on your journey to finding the best life coach for middle aged adults. Remember, the success of your journey is in your hands. With the right life coach, you can take control of your life and reach your full potential.

Harnessing the Power of Positive Thinking in Midlife

Many of us are stuck in our midlife rut and feel that life has passed us by. We might feel that we have lost our mojo and have nothing left to look forward to. This can be a difficult place to be, causing feelings of despair and hopelessness. But there is still hope.

Harnessing the power of positive thinking can be a game-changer for those stuck in their midlife slump. It’s not about thinking happy thoughts all the time; it’s about changing the way we think and feel about our lives. It requires us to take responsibility for our thoughts, feelings, and actions and to take steps to create the life we want.

As a life coach for middle aged individuals, I recommend using these tools to help you get the most out of life:

  • Become aware of your negative thoughts and assumptions and challenge them. Instead of focusing on what you cannot do or what is wrong in your life, focus on what you can do and how you can make a change.
  • Have an attitude of gratitude. This is key to unlocking the power of positive thinking. By appreciating the good things in life, we open ourselves up to new possibilities.
  • Set realistic goals and create a plan to achieve them. When we have a plan in place we are more likely to reach our goals.
  • Surround yourself with positive, supportive people. Positive relationships can have a powerful effect on our outlook and can help us to stay motivated.
  • Take time for yourself. Self-care is essential to harnessing the power of positive thinking. Taking time to focus on yourself and your own needs will help you to stay positive and focused.

Harnessing the power of positive thinking can be a game-changer for those stuck in their midlife slump. It can help us to take control of our lives, to accept ourselves for who we are, and to create the life we want. So take the time to focus on yourself and your own needs and find the motivation you need to get back on the path to a positive and fulfilled life.

Overcoming Life Challenges as a Middle-Aged Person

Challenging times can be a natural part of middle age, but they don’t have to be daunting. There are plenty of ways to confront and overcome life’s challenges, whether you’re seeking advice from a life coach for middle aged or simply trying some of your own strategies. Here are five tips for coping with middle-aged challenges:

  1. Set realistic goals. The first step to overcoming any challenge is acknowledging that it exists. Don’t try to tackle too much at once; break the task into manageable steps and focus on one goal at a time. This will help you stay motivated and give you a sense of satisfaction when you complete each step.
  2. Talk to someone. Talking about your challenges is one of the best ways to overcome them. Someone who understands you and can offer impartial advice can be incredibly helpful in getting through a difficult situation.
  3. Stay positive. It’s easy to get bogged down by negative thoughts when faced with a challenge, but resist the urge to dwell on them. Instead, focus on your strengths and positive e energy in order to power through the tough times.
  4. Take time for yourself. When faced with a challenging situation, sometimes it’s easy to neglect our own needs in favor of taking care of others. Make sure to carve out some time for yourself each day – (whether that means taking a relaxing bath, reading an enjoyable book, or simply taking a few minutes for yourself to breathe).

Cultivating Self-Care Habits for a Healthy Life

In order to cultivate self-care habits that will be healthy for you, it is important to start by understanding what is considered a healthy lifestyle. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, a healthy lifestyle includes getting enough exercise, eating a balanced diet, and getting enough sleep. Taking care of yourself not only impacts your physical health, but it can also impact your mental health, productivity, and relationships. To maintain a healthy lifestyle, it is important to break up your day into manageable chunks. When you are able to manage your time and tasks in a way that feels realistic for you, it becomes easier to stick to your goals. For example, if you have a goal of walking 30 minutes every day before work, try breaking that goal into smaller chunks such as 10 minute walks during your lunch break. Creating rituals around things that are important to you can also help you feel more connected to your goals. For example, if you are trying to eat healthier meals, make sure to have breakfast and dinner rituals that include family or friends. This will help tie together the everyday aspects of your life and make it easier to stick to your goals. Additionally, it is important to find ways to relieve stress even when things don’t go according to plan. Some methods of relief include meditation or deep breathing exercises. Additionally, journaling can be helpful in venting out frustration or exploring difficult emotions.

life coach for middle agedStrategies for Transitioning Into Retirement

 

If you’re in your early to mid-50s, it’s time to start thinking about retirement. There are a few strategies for transitioning into retirement: 

  1. Save your money. If you have some money saved up, you can use it to pay off debts or buy yourself a nice vacation. It may not be enough to retire on, but it will help ease the financial burden of retirement. 
  2. Consider a part-time career change. If you don’t want to retire immediately, consider changing your career so that you can continue working during retirement. This way, you won’t need as much money and you can still enjoy the benefits of a comfortable retirement lifestyle. 
  3. Use your savings to purchase a home. The longer you stay employed, the more likely it is that your income will decrease significantly when you retire. Buying a home allows you to maintain regular cash flow and still have plenty of money left over for retirement. 
  4. Declare bankruptcy or restructuring debt payments as one option for reducing monthly expenses in retirement. These options can substantially reduce your monthly obligations, making it easier to budget for expenses in retirement without reducing your current lifestyle too much.

Building Self-confidence and Self-esteem 

Building self-confidence and self-esteem is an essential part of life. Too often, people fall into a rut where they lose confidence in themselves. They no longer feel good about themselves and their abilities. This can be caused by events in the past or by current situations. There are many things that you can do to gain back confidence in yourself. Here are Three tips: 

  1. Take stock of your strengths. What are some things that you are good at? For example, are you good at making friends, doing math, or writing? Find out what your strengths are and use them to your advantage. Claim your successes! 
  2. Let go of the past mistakes. It’s important to remember that you cannot control the actions of other people in the past. Instead, focus on learning from them and moving forward. Make sure that you don’t dwell on what went wrong, but rather focus on how you can improve for the future. 
  3. Set realistic goals for yourself and strive for excellence rather than perfectionism. It’s important to have challenging goals but also allow yourself time to achieve them. Don’t get discouraged if you don’t reach your goal right away – success takes time! 

Developing Healthy Goals and Taking Action

One of the most important things you can do for yourself is develop healthy goals. Not only will this help you to stay on track and motivated, it will also give you a sense of accomplishment. Healthy goals should be specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-bound. Start by thinking about what you want to achieve in the next year. What are some concrete goals that you can measure? Once you have a list of goals, it’s time to figure out how to achieve them. Create a timeline and make sure each goal is connected to one another. For example, if your goal is to lose weight, make sure that exercising daily is part of your plan. Once you have your goals set and a timeline for achieving them, it’s time to take action. This may mean setting small achievable goals every day or week. Make sure to celebrate each victory along the way! It can be tough going through the tough parts of this process, but it’s worth it in the end.

Practical Tips for Developing Good Habits

Some people find it difficult to develop good habits. But with a bit of effort and help from a life coach, it’s possible to learn new behaviors that can improve your overall quality of life.

1. Identify your triggers and avoid them The first step in creating good habits is identifying the things that trigger you to act impulsively. Once you know what topics or activities set off your temptations, you can start to avoid them.

2. Make a plan Once you know what triggers your bad habits, it’s time to put together a plan of action. Make a list of all the things you need to do in order to break your old bad habits and develop new, healthier ones. Then, make sure to keep track of each step along the way so that you don’t procrastinate or get overwhelmed.

3. Get organized. It’s important to have a plan for changing your habits, and one of the best ways to achieve this is by being organized. Setting goals, dividing your time into specific blocks, and creating schedules are all useful tools for success when it comes to changing your behavior.

4. Be consistent. It’s important to remember that consistency is key when it comes to attaining good habits. If you want to stop smoking cigarettes, for example, you’ll need to make sure that you smoke fewer cigarettes every day than you did the day before – even if that means putting up with some cravings along the way.

5. Be patient. Remember that changing any habit takes time and effort – don’t be discouraged if at first it feels like nothing is changing! Remember: each small step toward change is meaningful in the long run.

Exploring the benefits of mindfulness and meditation

Mindfulness and meditation can be powerful tools for improving your mental health and well-being. By practicing mindfulness, you can learn to be more present and aware of your surroundings, which can lead to increased focus, productivity, and stress relief. Meanwhile, meditation can help improve your concentration and peacefulness of mind. So whether you’re looking to ease anxiety or simply improve your everyday wellbeing, mindfulness and meditation can be a great way to start.

Here are some of the benefits of mindfulness and meditation:

1) Mindfulness can help you focus and concentrate better. 

2) It can improve your mood and temperament. 

3) Meditation can help you to relax and detach from stressful thoughts. 

4) It can help you to deal with difficult emotions more effectively. 

5) Mindfulness can also help you to live a more peaceful and fulfilling life.

Strategies for Achieving Your Life Coach for Middle Aged      

If you’re middle-aged, there are probably some things you’re grateful for. You’ve been through a lot, and you’ve got a few good years left. But there are also challenges waiting for you: kids getting older, work piling up, health problems. You may be feeling overwhelmed. That’s where a life coach can be a huge help. A life coach is specially trained to help people with specific challenges in their lives. 

They can help you figure out goals and strategies for getting what you want out of life, and helping you stay on track when things get bumpy. There are a few things to keep in mind if you want to find a good life coach.

First, make sure the coach is qualified. Look for an organization that offers certification or diplomas in life coaching. This will make sure the coach knows what they’re doing and has the proper training.

Second, be realistic about your goals. A life coach for middle aged isn’t going to solve all your problems overnight – they’re not miraculous healers! So don’t expect them to be able to lift the weight off of your shoulders or solve all your problems on their own. Instead, ask the coach for guidance and support as you work towards your goals.

Finally, be honest with the coach about your struggles and limitations. It can be difficult to open up about our feelings, but honesty is key to building trust – and that’s key when working with a life coach!

Conclusion

The best life coach for middle aged individuals can help you to develop the skills and strategies necessary to lead a successful and fulfilling life. They can help you to set goals, create action plans, and develop the confidence and motivation needed to achieve those goals. With the right life coach, you can make the most of the years ahead and create a life that you can be proud of.

So, take the time to learn and understand your clients, and use your expertise to help them reach their potential.

A life coach's tips for living your best life, even after grief

A life coach’s tips for living your best life, even after grief

From being widowed while pregnant and losing her brother to cancer, to being diagnosed with a brain tumour and having to learn to walk again, Rachel Gotto has come out the other side with an eagerness to pass on her tips for living life to the fullest.

Now a qualified life coach, she joined the Jennifer Zamparelli Show to share her hard-won tips.

Gotto says she began turning her life around seven years ago. “I was emerging from a really dark place in my life and I’d been through a lot of trauma”, she says. “There was some spark that arose in me somewhere.”

“I actually woke up and knew that I had enough life under my belt, enough life experience, and I had this calling to give back.”

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Rachel felt that her lived experiences were “so powerful” that she could “help other people transform their lives back from literally devastation and loss”.

She started by training to be a hypnotherapist, before adding more teachings to her “toolbox”, which she brings with her to clients. “As each person’s different, it can take a lot of different little skills, hacks, strategies, along with the therapeutic process.”

Gotto says clients come to her specifically “because they know they can trust that I can hold the space for them”.

“Our lives are very important to us and we want somebody who is really there for us, who can listen deeply, who can get us and who can hold that overview over our problems so they can naturally empathise and be compassionate, but look for solutions and hacks unique to each individual person.

Although trained in various therapies, Gotto identifies as a life coach because she sees her role as “open[ing] up possibilities”. She aims to show clients that “they have possibilities, there is a different avenue and literally what’s holding them back are these deep-seated held beliefs”.

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These beliefs, she says, are sometimes “the things that sabotage, that rob us, and they rob us of our greatness and that feeling that we can go anywhere”.

As for whether this is something that faces Irish people more than others, Gotto says it’s what challenges many people all over the world.

“We have better days than others and we have little niggling bits that come and go”, she says. “But generally most people have self-esteem issues. We’re very good at hiding what’s underneath the surface, and we’re very good at putting up with our burdens.

“That’s why I think it’s so so important nowadays that we highlight mental health issues. Also that we become more transparent and open about our own struggles, and that’s what I like to do. I’m not perfect, my life isn’t perfect and I’m not fixed. I’m continually trying to fix myself.”

Her first tip is to silence your inner critic. “I don’t think that many people know that between 70 and 80 per cent of our thoughts are naturally negative. They arise out of the mind in a negative fashion”, she says.

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Once we recognise that and start challenging what we’re thinking, she says we begin addressing our beliefs.

At the core of our negative beliefs may be lack of confidence, so Gotto suggests taking time to understand where your triggers lie. “You’re giving yourself a little bit of support”, and from there you can start challenging it.

She says that by using the word “stop” to halt those beliefs, you can over time create some space for yourself to “choose a different thought”.

“You’re changing the narrative.”

For the full interview, listen back here.

If you have been affected by issues raised in this story, please visit: www.rte.ie/helplines.

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Recovery life coach to hold free 8-week program for Dauphin County families

Recovery life coach to hold free 8-week program for Dauphin County families

Stacey Karchner, a family recovery life coach trained through the BALM (Be A Loving Mirror) Institute, will be teaching a free online eight-week course for those in Dauphin County who are affected by another’s substance use disorder/addiction.

The course is sponsored by the Dauphin County Drug & Alcohol Services.

The course will be a component of the BALM program, consisting of 12 lessons. These include topics such as The Crucial Role of the Family, Leverage and Boundaries, Motivational Interviewing, Enabling vs Helping, Responding vs. Reacting, Self -Care and Mindfulness.

“Family members find a new perspective and learn new ways of acting, being and speaking without the anger and judgement, becoming the chief supporter rather than the obstacle,” Karchner said.

The course will begin Aug, 18 via Zoom and will be held 6 to 8:30 p.m. once a week for the eight weeks.

For more information or to enroll, email skarchner9@gmail.com or call Karchner at 814-360-7590.

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Downsizing | Ask the Life Coach

Downsizing | Ask the Life Coach

Dear Coach,

I recently sold my large home and this fall, I’m moving to a much smaller condo. As I sift through my belongings, I’m finding it extremely difficult to part with the many precious mementos I’ve accumulated over more than eighty years.

What do I keep, what do I give to charity or sell, what do I give to my children and grandchildren, what do I put in storage?

Do you have any suggestions on how to deal with this dilemma?

Signed,

Overwhelmed 



Dear Overwhelmed,







Recently, as I was polishing up the manuscript for my soon-to-be-published historical fiction, The Bootmaker’s Wife, I considered the plight of the pioneer housewife as she decided on the few things she would pack in her trunk or wedge into her covered wagon. Your situation isn’t as dire but the analogy is similar.

As you look around your home (I’d suggest taking photos to allow your scrutiny to be less biased), what draws your eyes, what sings to your heart, what have you carefully moved from home to home over the years? I challenge you to think only of yourself (I’m assuming you’re alone), not your children or grandchildren. Don’t let guilt creep in about what was once a gift that you’ve kept over the years “in case Cousin Sally comes to visit.”

My list is fairly short. The walnut, cane-backed rocker that I was rocked in as a baby sits in my bedroom along with a walnut chest made from wood taken from the first Nebraska homestead. The ring that was my mother’s and grandmother’s is always on my hand. The angel that sat atop my first birthday cake is missing a hand but is still on display. My wooden rolling pin was my mother’s and the original art that hung behind my parents when they were married and behind my husband and I when we were married, followed me from home to home.

In addition, there are a few current things I’d take like my newly acquired lemon dishes and some table runners made by a friend who is now gone. I have a collection of paper weights that I’m gradually giving away – I’d save a few. At seventy-seven, I understand your angst. Mementos from the past grow more precious as we age. They are a conduit for intense feelings of love and connection but we must sift through what is most important.

Karen Shinn, a senior move manager and cofounder of Downsizing Diva, a Toronto business that specializes in helping seniors declutter their lives, gives us some suggestions on how to do this. 

  • Start small. Start today. Pick a drawer. Shinn recommends setting a timer for 15 minutes and going through your stuff a bit at a time. 
  • Collect all of your photographs and make notes on the back as to who’s in them. If you don’t know the people in a photo, toss it. Distribute photos to the people in them. 
  • Millennials and Gen X-ers, the children of many people downsizing for retirement right now, would rather collect experiences than stuff. Don’t put something in storage for them. Save the fees and give them the cash to purchase what they want when they want it.
  • Make sure there’s a spot for the furniture you’re thinking of taking to your smaller space. Also, consider your storage space and pack accordingly. That lace tablecloth may have sentimental value but do you have the space to store it? Will you ever use it again?

Finally, I’d advise you to “always use the good stuff.” Don’t save it. Get rid of the old towels, sheets, dishes, placemats, etc. Use the ones you’ve set aside for “special occasions.” This time of your life is “a special occasion.” Get rid of clutter and surround yourself with what you love the most.

Good luck with your move!

 

Mershon Niesner is a Certified Life Coach and author of “Mom’s Gone, Now What? Ten Steps to Help Daughters Move Forward After Mother Loss” which is available on Amazon; also, locally at Sunshine Booksellers and Keep In Touch. For more information visit www.mershonniesner.com. Email your coaching questions to: askcoachmershon@gmail.com. Your identity will be kept strictly confidential.

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How To Stop Being A Perfectionist & The Downsides To Being One

Depending on who you ask, people may consider perfectionism to be a strength or a weakness.

Throughout my time as an excellence-seeking perfectionist (meaning I have a high level of standards for myself and the people in my life), I have found that being perfect isn’t a strength, it’s a weakness.

It’s important to have a reality check with yourself and learn how to stop being a perfectionist — it’s not good for your mental health!

Is perfectionism a mental disorder?

While perfectionism itself isn’t recognized as a mental disorder, people who struggle with perfectionism oftentimes experience comorbid mental health issues. If you’re struggling with anxiety, depression, or eating disorders, perfectionist thoughts could make those illnesses worsen.

The other kind of perfectionists (failure-avoiding) are concerned with their own desire to succeed for fear of not being good enough in the eyes of others.

Perfectionist tendencies can cause you to not be able to achieve your goals, practice negative self-talk, and have too high standards.

RELATED: The Types Of Perfectionists That Have Existed Across Generations

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How To Process The Death Of Someone Who Negatively Affected Your Life

How To Process The Death Of Someone Who Negatively Affected Your Life

Grief is a process that’s highly personal and unknowable until you’re in it.

And though experts say there’s no right or wrong way to mourn someone, when the person who died is someone you had conflicted feelings about ― say, a toxic parent, or an ex-spouse with whom you begrudgingly co-parented for years ― it’s easy to feel like you’re doing it wrong.

“When this type of grief shows up with clients, they are confused and not sure what to do with how they feel,” said Michelle Chalfant, a licensed therapist and holistic life coach based in Nashville, Tennessee. “They want guidance on how to navigate their emotions — or lack thereof — around the loss.”

Chalfant described a client she once had who came in for help after her abusive, narcissistic mother died. The woman, an only child now in her 40s, had distanced herself from her mom over the years out of self-preservation. Upon her mother’s death, the client felt an odd mix of feelings: sadness because it was her mother who died, but also gratitude that the abuse would cease.

“I have seen children come to funerals who haven’t seen their parents in decades. I’ve tried to convince others to come and just be present, and they refused.”

– Jennifer Kaluzny, a rabbi at Temple Israel in West Bloomfield, Michigan

“She felt ashamed to feel this way and wanted clarity on if she was a ‘bad person’ for, on some level, being happy about the abuse ending,” Chalfant said. “She also needed help processing the death of the relationship she hoped to cultivate with her mom one day.”

More than anything, the woman was looking for validation in her disparate emotions.

“That’s a common theme with people in this type of scenario,” Chalfant said. “They wonder how they ‘should’ be feeling, but the truth is, there is no particular feeling they should feel. It’s unique to each person experiencing grief.”

Jennifer Kaluzny, a rabbi at Temple Israel in West Bloomfield, Michigan, thinks the experience is so difficult because it reopens old wounds ― including some that you may believe have already healed. You may have already worked through trauma that you attribute to your estranged sister, for instance, but now that she’s gone, it crops up again uninvited.

“Unfortunately many families have significant tension or an estrangement,” Kaluzny told HuffPost. “I have seen children come to funerals who haven’t seen their parents in decades. I’ve tried to convince others to come and just be present, and they refused.”

These issues frequently surface when parents die. If abuse, abandonment or extreme favoritism of another child were present in someone’s childhood, a grown child isn’t always looking to honor the person who was the source of that deep hurt.

“Many choose a ritual of their own and perform it surrounded by people who love and support them instead,” Kaluzny said.

Thanasis Zovoilis via Getty Images

It’s important to stay curious and have no preconceived notions about what you think you “should” feel, therapist Michelle Chalfant said.

For those who choose to attend the funeral, though, Kaluzny tells them they can participate — or not — in whatever parts of the service they wish.

I am very open with the families I serve, and I let them know that they can share what they wish, and we can highlight the good, and downplay or not even mention the bad,” she said.

Clearly, this is knotty, complicated stuff. If you’re in this position right now, we have some advice from grief experts like Kaluzny on how to deal with your feelings.

Double up on the self-compassion.

There’s a strong cultural taboo against speaking ill of the dead, largely because they can’t defend themselves. If you feel relief that someone is gone, or you can’t help reflecting on the not-so-wonderful parts about the person, it’s easy to be self-critical.

Instead of doing that, cut yourself some slack, said M. Katherine Shear, a professor of psychiatry at Columbia University and the founding director of the Center for Complicated Grief at the Columbia School of Social Work. It’s really OK to have minimal or absent grief, or even to feel relief when someone who hurt you has died.

“Treat yourself with compassion,” Shear told HuffPost. “Most of us, even those of us who show compassion to others, have a hard time treating ourselves kindly and recognizing that emotional pain is a universal human experience. When we judge ourselves negatively, it only adds to the pain of a difficult experience like this.”

Slow down, breathe and check in with yourself.

When we have unpleasant emotions, we often try to busy ourselves to avoid the feelings. In the immediate moment ― say, after hearing the news of the person’s death ― give yourself permission to feel everything, and slow down and make time for yourself, Chalfant said.

“When we take the time to slow down, emotions tend to rise up, which is a good thing here,” she said. “Deep, slow breathing helps as well. Breath helps to move emotions. If you feel wound up or stressed, go for a walk or just sit quietly and check in with how you are feeling.”

Staying curious, and having no preconceived notions about what you think you should be feeling, is also beneficial when checking in with yourself, she said.

"We need to remember to go at our own pace [with grief], not compare our process to others,” Chalfant said.
“We need to remember to go at our own pace [with grief], not compare our process to others,” Chalfant said.

Don’t compare your grief to other people’s.

While you might not even be sure you want to attend your dad’s funeral, your brother, who dealt with the same haranguing and mean-spirited comments growing up, may be eager to speak at the service ― even reverentially, about the good parts of the man. You have to be OK with that. Grief is personal, and it will do you no favors to compare your grief with someone else’s or judge them for their response, Chalfant said.

“We need to remember to go at our own pace, not compare our process to others,” she said. “Taking care of yourself and tending to your specific needs is always important, but especially when you are tending to the wounds of grief.”

Find a way to express your feelings, like through journaling.

It’s important to find a way to tap into your feelings and thoughts, whether it’s talking to a therapist (here’s a helpful guide on how to find affordable counseling), talking to a close friend, expressing it through a beloved creative hobby, or journaling.

“Journaling can be a gateway into our grief and emotions,” Chalfant said. “When we take a pen to paper and begin to write, our inside feelings are able to move through us and onto paper. It’s very cathartic and an easy tool to use with grief.”

To begin, ask yourself what you’re feeling. If you feel numb, write about it, Chalfant said. If you feel sad, write about it. If it feels like you’re going long on either subject ― dwelling on the good, or dwelling on the bad ― don’t feel like you have to balance it out by writing more about what you “should” feel.

“With journaling, it’s a personal experience, and anything and everything you write is perfect,” Chalfant said. “You can’t get it wrong.”

Journaling can be a particularly cathartic way to deal with complicated grief.

Dianne Avery Photography via Getty Images

Journaling can be a particularly cathartic way to deal with complicated grief.

Better yet, write a letter to the person you lost.

When working with people in mourning, Kaluzny occasionally suggests they write a letter to their loved one and not send it. Say everything you would have said if they were standing right in front of you, she tells them. This exercise works particularly well if you’re dealing with complicated, seemingly-at-odds emotions.

“Some people say it’s a very cathartic experience,” Kaluzny said.

Be OK with experiencing “absent grief.”

It’s almost always helpful to give a name to something we’re experiencing. What you may be going through right now could be “absent grief.”

According to the American Psychological Association, “absent grief” is a form of “complicated grief in which a person shows no, or only a few, signs of distress about the death of a loved one. This pattern of grief is thought to be an impaired response resulting from denial or avoidance of the emotional realities of the loss.”

With absent grief, the emotional states we (rightly or wrongly) associate with mourning ― denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance ― may never manifest, or may manifest much later on, even years down the line.

“Absent grief is something that I think many people experience over time,” Kaluzny said. “They realize that they can live their life again and it doesn’t hurt so badly ― then, all of a sudden, it strikes when you least expect it.”

Grief is sly that way, she said.

“You could feel fine, even right after the death, and then you are standing at the grocery store and you see your loved one’s favorite ice cream and you fall to your knees in the frozen food section,” Kaluzny said. “It’s entirely normal.”

Need help? In the U.S., call 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) for the National Domestic Violence Hotline.

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Francesca, a Romanian life coach based in the US has revealed five tips and trick to make sure you're the most attractive person in the room

Life coach reveals how be the most attractive person from talking slowly to rocking wet hair  

A life coach has revealed five ‘psychology tips’ that she says will make you appear like attractive person in the room – from talking slowly to sporting wet hair, the life coach ensures her tips will have everyone’s eyes on you. 

Coach Francesca, who is based in the US, but originally from Romania, studied psychology at at City University in London, and regularly makes headlines with her psychology tips, which she shares with her 1.1 million followers on TikTok. 

In one of her most recent videos, Francesca shared a number of tips which she says will make people find you attractive. 

Francesca, a Romanian life coach based in the US has revealed five tips and trick to make sure you’re the most attractive person in the room

Use your hands when you talk to appear more confident

In her video, which racked up over 162,000 views, Francesca told her followers to use their hands when they talk because it makes them seem ‘more confident.’ 

The first tip she gave her over 1.1 million followers was to use their hands when they talk because it makes them appear 'more confident and engaging'

The first tip she gave her over 1.1 million followers was to use their hands when they talk because it makes them appear ‘more confident and engaging’

She added that when using hand gestures you seem ‘more engaging.’ 

Talking with your hands is said to make you appear more charismatic and  implies higher levels of energy and attraction. 

Research has shown that people who talk with their hands are seen as warm, passionate, energetic and welcoming, while those don’t use hand gestures are seen as cold and closed off. 

Body language experts have even examine certain hand gestures that make you appear most attractive and confident. 

One hand gesture that often attracts people is when you have your palms facing up at a 45 degree angle and  your fingers lightly spread apart. 

This hand gesture signifies you’re open and honest, which allows others to gravitate to you more.

Studies have also shown that talking with your hands makes your more liked and encourages people to listen to you more.  

Rock a wet-hair look to ramp up your attractiveness

Francesca’s next tip was to ‘keep your hair wet.’ 

The Romanian life coach added: ‘For some reason we tend to rate people with wet hair as more attractive.’ 

In recent years the wet hair look has become something to embrace rather than something to hide from. 

Whether you’re coming out of the shower or pool, if you’re hair is wet, you’re sure to catch the attention of everyone around you. 

Her next tip was to 'keep your hair wet,' which she noted was because people tend to 'rate people with wet hair as more attractive'

Kim Kardashian sported wet hair, causing everyone to follow at the 2019 Met Gala

Her next tip was to ‘keep your hair wet,’ a look popularized by celebrities like Kim Kardashian (right), saying people tend to ‘rate people with wet hair as more attractive’

Kim Kardashian proved the wet hair look could look seductive in 2019 Met Gala dress, which looked like it was dripping with water. and sported with soaking wet hair. 

Furthermore the wet hair look can make you appear more attractive because boasts both glamour and edge. 

The effortless hairstyle is said to give a naturally sexy look with no little to no work, so next time you get out of the shower, feel free to ditch the hair dryer if you want to catch the attention of others.

The life coach added that talking slowly helps you come across as 'confident'

The life coach added that talking slowly helps you come across as ‘confident’

Ignite passion by talking slowly  

The third tip the life coach shared was to ‘take your time when you talk.’ 

She added: ‘Take breaks and talk slowly,

‘Rushing makes you come across as insecure, while taking your time makes you seem relaxed and confident.’ 

There are many benefits of talking slowly including having more control, feeling more relaxed and feeling more steady. 

When you speak slowly not only do those listening to you have an easier time processing your words, but you also give your words more weight and power, which makes you appear more knowledgeable and confident. 

Talking slowly inspires passion and evokes more emotion among others, which helps you come across as more attractive. 

Speaking slowly is also said to win anyone over by charming them with your passion and confidence. 

Francesca added enjoying yourself will attract people towards you

Francesca added enjoying yourself will attract people towards you 

Smile authentically and have warm body language 

‘Just enjoying yourself and having a good time makes people come to you like a magnet,’ said the Romanian life coach. 

It’s often said that you are what you attract, in other words what comes to you is a reflection of you.

When you are happy and enjoying your life, people gravitate towards you because they are similar in nature and because they want to be you. 

This carefree attitude brings pulls people towards you and attracts them right away. 

If someone sees you genuinely happy, they can’t help but to pull themselves towards you, in hopes of attracting the same attitude or having someone around them who they can look towards when they struggle to authentically enjoy themselves. 

Try to embrace your own sensual energy 

The final tip Francesca gives her followers is to have ‘sensual energy.’ 

‘This means feeling good in your own skin and letting your sexual energy flow in your body.’

Having sensual energy was her final tip, which meant 'letting your sexual energy flow'

Having sensual energy was her final tip, which meant ‘letting your sexual energy flow’

Although many people think of sex when they hear the words ‘sensual energy,’ it actually plays a role in many aspects of life, not just sex. 

When you learn to accept yourself for you who you are, you begin to create sensual energy. 

This energy evokes powerful emotions and makes you seem more confident, which helps pull people towards you. 

Learning how to create and harness this sensual energy can help you become more creative and tackle big goals and projects.

This level of ambition and success make people gravitate to you and find you more attractive. 

The life coach noted that sensual energy can be built by accepting yourself for the way you are and being genuinely happy. 

The aura that comes along with harnessing sensual energy will cause everyone in the room to never take their eyes off you. 

The life coach's video gained over 21,000 likes with many users praising her for her tips, while others joked they already had these tips down

The life coach’s video gained over 21,000 likes with many users praising her for her tips, while others joked they already had these tips down

In the past, Francesca has given her followers helpful tips like how to make anyone like you – which include asking them to do you a favor, using the person’s name when speaking,  giving compliments and mirroring their body language and tone of voice. 

She even shared ways to secretly know if your crush liked you back, which included your crush not making eye contact, sliding their hand down your arm and if they stand up straight. 

The life coach’s video gained over 21,000 likes with many users praising her for her tips, while others joked they already had these tips down. 

‘Thank you dear,’ said one user.

Another user added: ‘Oily hair count?’ 

‘Good to know,’ commented another user.

‘Hahaha do all these things including greasy hair,’ wrote another user.  

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"Show Up Positive" ($15.99) by Rita Ernst is available at Carmichael's Bookstore and Amazon.

Try these 3 tips to ‘Show Up Positive’ and find job satisfaction

Even if you’ve stayed with your current job since the onset of the coronavirus pandemic in 2020, the unprecedented churn in the U.S. labor market over the past two and a half years may have you thinking, “am I happy where I am?”

If so, you’re not alone.

“For the better part of a century, we have accepted whatever terms and conditions companies put in front of us,” said Louisville-based executive coach and organizational psychologist Rita Ernst. “The pandemic threw everything up in the air and gave us the ability to scrutinize our jobs, which we were not doing before, simply out of habit.”

As the nation’s “quit rate” reached a 20-year high last November, experts started referring to the phenomenon as “The Great Resignation.” According to the Pew Research Center, about one-in-five non-retired U.S. adults (19%) — including similar shares of men (18%) and women (20%) — say they quit a job at some point in 2021, meaning they left by choice and not because they were fired, laid off or because a temporary job had ended.

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