Life Coach: 3 tips to boost your luck

Life Coach: 3 tips to boost your luck

HARLINGEN, Texas (ValleyCentral) — Life Coach Grecia Karlsson says when you hear the word “luck” the first thing that comes to peoples’ minds is winning the lottery or becoming famous overnight.

However, Karlsson says the money and fame of these events are often short-lived. She wants to share with the public her 3 tips to boost your luck.

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teen life skills coach

Teen Life Skills Coach

If you are a parent or guardian of a teen, it’s important to have some pointers on how to help them navigate their difficult teenage years. One way to do that is by enlisting the help of a teen life skills coach. A life skills coach can provide guidance and support as your teen explores important areas of their development, such as self-esteem, communication, and problem-solving. A life skills coach can also help your teen build positive habits and skills for success. For example, a teen life skills coach might help your son learn how to socially network and make connections, or help your daughter develop good time management habits. The goal is to equip your teen with the tools they need to navigate the challenges that come with being a teenager – and ultimately, make their teenage years easier and more fulfilling.

The Benefits of Developing Good Life Skills as a Teen

If you’re a teenager, it’s natural to feel like your world is spinning out of control. You’re trying to figure out who you are and where you fit in the world. It can be tough when everything feels new and overwhelming.

But don’t worry – you aren’t alone. Every teenager goes through this stage. And if you can keep your head while all of the worlds are turning upside down, you will be on your way to a great life.

The benefits of developing good life skills as a teen go beyond simply thriving in your own career and personal life. When you have a strong life coach for teens skills, you’re better equipped to handle any situation that arises.

 Here are some of the benefits of developing good life skills:

  1. You’ll be more confident. Self-confidence is key when it comes to dealing with difficult situations, no matter what they are. When you know how to manage yourself and your emotions, you’ll be less likely to let anything get the best of you.
  2. You’ll be more resilient. When things don’t go the way you planned, having good life skills can help you bounce back quickly. You’ll know how to cope with setbacks and don’t worry about making mistakes – it’s all part of learning and growth.
  3. You’ll have a strong network of support. When something important happens in your life – whether that’s a family conflict or an unexpected job difficulty – having a supportive network will help you through it. Having life skills and knowledge puts you in a better position to connect with people who can help you reach your goals.
  4. You’ll have empathy for others. As we all know, not everything goes our way and we encounter difficult situations from time to time. Having good life skills means that you’re more likely to understand and empathize with other people who are experiencing the same thing, which can make the experience easier for both of you.
  5. You’ll be more confident in your own abilities. When you know what you’re capable of, you’re less likely to feel inferior or like a failure. And that confidence will shine through in all areas of your life – including your career and personal relationships.

So how do you develop good life skills? There’s no one right answer – it’s a process that takes time and effort. But by starting early, you can set the stage for a successful future.

How to Overcome Challenges and Reach Your Goals |Teen Life Skills Coach|

Challenges are part of the teenage years, and they can be a big challenge to overcome. However, with the help of some life skills coach advice, you can get through them and reach your goals.

If you find yourself falling short in your efforts to improve your grades or meet other challenges, it may be helpful to talk about them with a life coach for teens skills coach. A Teen Life Skills Coach can offer guidance and support as you work towards reaching your goals.

If you’re contemplating delaying or dropping out of college, here are 10 life skills to help you succeed:

  1. Find a mentor. Look for people who have achieved their goals and ask them how they did it. It can be someone in your life, such as a family member or friend, or professional.
  2. Set realistic goals. Don’t set too many impossible expectations for yourself; instead, focus on achievable goals that you can track and measure.
  3. Make time for yourself. carve out time each week to do things that make you happy, such as exercising, reading books, or spending time with friends.
  4. Get organized. declutter your room and create systems for managing your time and tasks. This will help you stay on top of your priorities and get more accomplished overall.
  5. Stay positive and persistent. When things get tough, remember to keep your chin up and stay persistent in pursuing your goals. cultivate a growth mindset and don’t give up until you’ve reached your goal!
  6. Take classes and workshops in subjects that interest you. Whether it’s learning Spanish, cooking French food, or playing the guitar, Pursuing interests can broaden your knowledge base and help you develop new skills that will be useful in later endeavors..

7 Develop a work ethic. Be sure to show up on time each day, finish what you start, and take the initiative to learn more about what you’re doing.

  1. Seek out help when you need it. If you feel like you’re struggling to meet your goals, don’t hesitate to reach out for support from family, friends, or a life skills coach.
  2. Be honest with yourself. It’s important to be honest with yourself about your strengths and weaknesses. This will help you identify areas where you need to focus on improving.
  3. Persevere! The most important thing is not to give up, no matter how difficult the challenge may seem at first. As long as you keep taking small steps toward your goal, eventually, you’ll reach it!

If you’re feeling overwhelmed by your challenges, it’s important to seek out help. A life skills coach can offer guidance and support as you work towards reaching your goals.

Tips for Staying Organized and Productive

Creating a system for your daily routine and sticking to it can help you feel more organized and productive.

  1. Make a plan: Start by making a list of the things you need to do each day. This could include things like homework, chores, errands, breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Knowing what is expected of you will help reduce stress and ensure that you are able to get everything done on time.
  2. Break big tasks into manageable chunks: Instead of trying to do a whole project at once, break the task down into smaller parts that you can complete over time. This will help reduce stress and allow you to better focus on the task at hand.
  3. Use timers: Setting timers can also be helpful when it comes to completing tasks quickly. This way, you know when the time is up and can move on to the next step in your plan.
  4. Get organized: One way to increase productivity is by getting your work area organized and tidy. This will help reduce the amount of time needed to find what you are looking for and will also make it easier for you to stay focused during working hours.
  5. Find an ally: Many people find that collaborating with others helps them get more accomplished in their work areas. If this is not possible or if working with others seems overwhelming, try finding an ally- someone who will hold you accountable for completing your tasks on schedule- even if it’s just for one day.

Teen Life Skills Coach



The Power of Positive Thinking for Teens

Positive thinking has long been touted as one of the most powerful tools for teens. According to experts, positive thinking can help teens deal with difficult situations and achieve their goals.

One of the best ways to start thinking positively is to set small goals for yourself. Instead of focusing on the things you don’t want to happen, focus on the things you do want to happen. Write down your goals and then revisit them regularly, so you don’t forget about them.

Another strategy is to take control of your environment. When you’re faced with a difficult situation, try to reframe it in a way that makes sense to you. For example, if someone is giving you negative attention, think about how you can turn that attention into something that will help you achieve your goal.

Finally, keep in mind that there’s no such thing as a single “positive” thought. Whether it’s focusing on your strengths or accepting negative experiences as part of life, taking a positive approach will help you stay motivated and focused during tough times.

How to Balance School, Social Life, and Hobbies

There are times when it can be hard to balance school, social life, and hobbies. However, with a little strategy, you can make sure that everything is lined up just the way you want it. 

Here are some tips for balancing your teen life:

  1. Make a schedule and stick to it. Establishing a routine will help you stay on track and avoid feeling overwhelmed. This will also help to minimize distractions during class.
  2. Find synergies among your interests. When you have multiple interests that are compatible, it makes it easier to focus on one thing at a time. For example, if you’re passionate about music and writing, join an online forum where people share ideas and collaborate on projects. Not only will this help keep your focus while studying; it might even inspire new writing ideas!
  3. Set goals for yourself and strive for improvement every day. When you set goals for yourself, it becomes much harder to give up or let things slide. Try breaking down your goal into smaller chunks so that you feel more confident about reaching them. Also, reward yourself after each accomplishment – this will help keep you motivated!

How to Build Self-Confidence as a Teen

Building self-confidence as a teen can be difficult, but there are a few things you can do to help increase your odds. In this article, we will discuss some of the most important things you can do to start building your self-confidence.

First and foremost, it is important to be yourself. Don’t try to fake it or act like someone you’re not. The more authentic you are with who you are, the more confident people will see you as being. Being yourself also means setting high standards for yourself and holding yourself accountable for meeting them. When you set high standards for yourself, it becomes much easier to stay motivated and stay on track.

Another key factor in building self-confidence is maintaining a positive attitude. It’s easy to get down when things don’t go our way, but having a positive attitude will help you embrace the good moments and take advantage of the bad ones. When you have a positive outlook on life, everything feels easier and the challenges feel less daunting.

Finally, it’s important to have friends who support you and care about you. Having supportive friends makes it much easier to build confidence because they’ll be cheering for you when things go well and help you through tough times. Plus, spending time with supportive friends can improve your overall mood and make life just that bit more enjoyable.

How to Improve Communication Skills

If you are looking for ways to improve your communication skills, there are many resources available. One simple way to get started is to read and discuss communication techniques with friends and family. You can also look for books or DVDs that teach communication skills. You can also attend workshops or classes on communication. 

In addition, you can try practicing the following tips:

  1. Take the time to listen to what the other person is saying. Don’t interrupt, talk over them, or change the subject abruptly. Let them complete their thoughts before you respond.
  2. Be honest and straightforward in your conversations. Avoid giving non-verbal signals such as body language that might suggest you don’t believe what the other person is saying.
  3. Use active listening skills when you are trying to understand what the other person is saying. Make eye contact, nod your head occasionally, and ask questions when necessary to clarify what they are saying.
  4. Use positive reinforcement when trying to encourage someone else in a conversation or meeting. This could include words such as “nice job” or “you’re right.”

Strategies to Handle Anxiety and Stress

If you find yourself feeling anxious or stressed often, there are some strategies you can use to manage those feelings and keep them under control.

First, it’s important to understand what causes anxiety and stress – in other words, what factors make them happen. Things that can contribute to anxiety and stress include a range of personal factors (like your experiences and genetics), environmental factors (like how safe or unsafe the environment is), and situational factors (like being in a new place or having a big presentation).

Once you know what’s causing your anxiety or stress, it’s important to learn how to deal with those feelings. One way to do this is by recognizing when your anxiety or stress is starting to kick in, and then doing something to try and reduce the intensity of the feeling. This could involve taking deep breaths, focusing on positive thoughts, or calming exercises like yoga or meditation.

Another key strategy for managing anxiety and stress is maintaining healthy social relationships. Having supportive friends and family members can help you cope with difficult situations because they’ll provide a listening ear and emotional support when you need it most. And staying connected with loved ones doesn’t have to be limited to traditional “me time” – hitting up your favorite hangout spot with friends is also a great way to relieve some tension!

Finally, it’s important to stay focused on your long-term goals – even during tough times. When you’re pursuing a goal that matters to you, the worry and stress that come with it can be easier to deal with. Putting your goals front and center can also help you stay motivated in the face of anxiety and stress.

Teen Life Skills Coach


Understanding Your Finances as a Teen

Understanding your finances as a teen is important for two reasons. First, your money will be a very important factor in your overall happiness and well-being. It’s important to have enough money to cover basic expenses and have some leftovers for extras and treats. Second, it’s important to learn about your finances so you can make smart decisions about spending and investing. 

Here are some tips on how to get started:

  1. Start with your weekly budget. This is the simplest way to get started understanding your finances. Simply divide each day of the week into different categories (eating, entertainment, bills, etc.) and figure out how much money you’re spending in each category on average. This will help you see where you might be overspending or under Spending too much money in one area of your life can lead to problems down the road when it comes to saving or investing for the future.
  2. Make a budget plan. When you have a good understanding of how much money you’re spending each month, it’s time to create a budget plan that reflects that information. The goal of a budget is to stay within your allocated income while still allowing yourself some flexibility for fun and things that are important to you (like eating out). There are many online tools available that can help make this process easier ( like Mint ), but ultimately the most important part is making sure that you actually follow through with the plan!
  3. Review your debts and credit reports regularly. One of the most important things you can do to improve your financial situation is to review your debts and credit reports regularly. This will help you identify any potential problems with your debt payments or credit history, and make necessary changes to fix them.
  4. Protect your savings. One of the best ways to build a strong financial future is to protect your savings. This means setting up automatic transfers from your checking account into a savings account each month and using a solid investment strategy to grow your money over time. There are many helpful resources available online (like Personal Capital ) that can help you get started.

Developing Healthy Habits for a Better Future

The habits you develop now will shape your future. Here are five healthy habits to start building today:

  1. Eat a balanced diet. Your diet has a big impact on your overall health and well-being. Make sure to include plenty of fruits, vegetables, and whole grains in your meals.
  2. Exercise regularly. Exercising releases endorphins, which can help reduce stress and tension levels. Aim for at least thirty minutes of moderate-intensity exercise each day, such as walking or biking.
  3. Get enough sleep every night. Getting enough sleep is essential for your health and well-being. Try to get at least seven hours of sleep each night.
  4. Connect with people who care about you. People are the key to success, so make sure to connect with others in meaningful ways- through friends, family, or community groups for example.
  5. Use positive self-talk throughout the day. When things get tough, remind yourself that you have the ability to handle whatever comes your way! Practice positive self-talk regularly throughout the day- it will help boost your confidence and lift your spirits!

Are you feeling lost in your teenage years? Do you feel like you’re not quite sure what to do next? Or maybe you just don’t have any friends to talk to about these things? If so, then a teen life skills coach might be just what you need! These coaches can help guide and support your journey through adolescence, by teaching you things like how to become more confident, how to make new friends, and how to deal with common problems. If You’re considering using a teen life skills coach, here are some tips for finding the right one:

  1. First, consider your goals. What specifically do you want the coach to help you achieve? This will help narrow down the options and make finding a coach that is right for you easier.
  2. Next, research which coaches are available in your area. There are many services available, so it can be difficult to choose which one is best for you.
  3. Finally, meet with a few coaches and decide which one is best for you. Coaches vary in terms of price, style, and content, so it’s important to find someone who will fit well with your personality and lifestyle.


Teen life is tough. Between developing social skills and coping with hormones, it can be hard to know where to turn for help. That’s why we’ve compiled a list of teen life skills coach services that can offer you the support you need to navigate these tricky years. Whether you’re dealing with anxiety or just want someone to talk to about your crushes, there are plenty of options available on our list. So don’t hesitate – to give one of these services a try today and see how they can help you become a better teen!

A life coach's tips for living your best life, even after grief

A life coach’s tips for living your best life, even after grief

From being widowed while pregnant and losing her brother to cancer, to being diagnosed with a brain tumour and having to learn to walk again, Rachel Gotto has come out the other side with an eagerness to pass on her tips for living life to the fullest.

Now a qualified life coach, she joined the Jennifer Zamparelli Show to share her hard-won tips.

Gotto says she began turning her life around seven years ago. “I was emerging from a really dark place in my life and I’d been through a lot of trauma”, she says. “There was some spark that arose in me somewhere.”

“I actually woke up and knew that I had enough life under my belt, enough life experience, and I had this calling to give back.”

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Rachel felt that her lived experiences were “so powerful” that she could “help other people transform their lives back from literally devastation and loss”.

She started by training to be a hypnotherapist, before adding more teachings to her “toolbox”, which she brings with her to clients. “As each person’s different, it can take a lot of different little skills, hacks, strategies, along with the therapeutic process.”

Gotto says clients come to her specifically “because they know they can trust that I can hold the space for them”.

“Our lives are very important to us and we want somebody who is really there for us, who can listen deeply, who can get us and who can hold that overview over our problems so they can naturally empathise and be compassionate, but look for solutions and hacks unique to each individual person.

Although trained in various therapies, Gotto identifies as a life coach because she sees her role as “open[ing] up possibilities”. She aims to show clients that “they have possibilities, there is a different avenue and literally what’s holding them back are these deep-seated held beliefs”.

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These beliefs, she says, are sometimes “the things that sabotage, that rob us, and they rob us of our greatness and that feeling that we can go anywhere”.

As for whether this is something that faces Irish people more than others, Gotto says it’s what challenges many people all over the world.

“We have better days than others and we have little niggling bits that come and go”, she says. “But generally most people have self-esteem issues. We’re very good at hiding what’s underneath the surface, and we’re very good at putting up with our burdens.

“That’s why I think it’s so so important nowadays that we highlight mental health issues. Also that we become more transparent and open about our own struggles, and that’s what I like to do. I’m not perfect, my life isn’t perfect and I’m not fixed. I’m continually trying to fix myself.”

Her first tip is to silence your inner critic. “I don’t think that many people know that between 70 and 80 per cent of our thoughts are naturally negative. They arise out of the mind in a negative fashion”, she says.

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Once we recognise that and start challenging what we’re thinking, she says we begin addressing our beliefs.

At the core of our negative beliefs may be lack of confidence, so Gotto suggests taking time to understand where your triggers lie. “You’re giving yourself a little bit of support”, and from there you can start challenging it.

She says that by using the word “stop” to halt those beliefs, you can over time create some space for yourself to “choose a different thought”.

“You’re changing the narrative.”

For the full interview, listen back here.

If you have been affected by issues raised in this story, please visit:

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Recovery life coach to hold free 8-week program for Dauphin County families

Recovery life coach to hold free 8-week program for Dauphin County families

Stacey Karchner, a family recovery life coach trained through the BALM (Be A Loving Mirror) Institute, will be teaching a free online eight-week course for those in Dauphin County who are affected by another’s substance use disorder/addiction.

The course is sponsored by the Dauphin County Drug & Alcohol Services.

The course will be a component of the BALM program, consisting of 12 lessons. These include topics such as The Crucial Role of the Family, Leverage and Boundaries, Motivational Interviewing, Enabling vs Helping, Responding vs. Reacting, Self -Care and Mindfulness.

“Family members find a new perspective and learn new ways of acting, being and speaking without the anger and judgement, becoming the chief supporter rather than the obstacle,” Karchner said.

The course will begin Aug, 18 via Zoom and will be held 6 to 8:30 p.m. once a week for the eight weeks.

For more information or to enroll, email or call Karchner at 814-360-7590.


Harrisburg woman killed in California hotel room was there ‘trying to figure life out’, mom says

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Downsizing | Ask the Life Coach

Downsizing | Ask the Life Coach

Dear Coach,

I recently sold my large home and this fall, I’m moving to a much smaller condo. As I sift through my belongings, I’m finding it extremely difficult to part with the many precious mementos I’ve accumulated over more than eighty years.

What do I keep, what do I give to charity or sell, what do I give to my children and grandchildren, what do I put in storage?

Do you have any suggestions on how to deal with this dilemma?



Dear Overwhelmed,

Recently, as I was polishing up the manuscript for my soon-to-be-published historical fiction, The Bootmaker’s Wife, I considered the plight of the pioneer housewife as she decided on the few things she would pack in her trunk or wedge into her covered wagon. Your situation isn’t as dire but the analogy is similar.

As you look around your home (I’d suggest taking photos to allow your scrutiny to be less biased), what draws your eyes, what sings to your heart, what have you carefully moved from home to home over the years? I challenge you to think only of yourself (I’m assuming you’re alone), not your children or grandchildren. Don’t let guilt creep in about what was once a gift that you’ve kept over the years “in case Cousin Sally comes to visit.”

My list is fairly short. The walnut, cane-backed rocker that I was rocked in as a baby sits in my bedroom along with a walnut chest made from wood taken from the first Nebraska homestead. The ring that was my mother’s and grandmother’s is always on my hand. The angel that sat atop my first birthday cake is missing a hand but is still on display. My wooden rolling pin was my mother’s and the original art that hung behind my parents when they were married and behind my husband and I when we were married, followed me from home to home.

In addition, there are a few current things I’d take like my newly acquired lemon dishes and some table runners made by a friend who is now gone. I have a collection of paper weights that I’m gradually giving away – I’d save a few. At seventy-seven, I understand your angst. Mementos from the past grow more precious as we age. They are a conduit for intense feelings of love and connection but we must sift through what is most important.

Karen Shinn, a senior move manager and cofounder of Downsizing Diva, a Toronto business that specializes in helping seniors declutter their lives, gives us some suggestions on how to do this. 

  • Start small. Start today. Pick a drawer. Shinn recommends setting a timer for 15 minutes and going through your stuff a bit at a time. 
  • Collect all of your photographs and make notes on the back as to who’s in them. If you don’t know the people in a photo, toss it. Distribute photos to the people in them. 
  • Millennials and Gen X-ers, the children of many people downsizing for retirement right now, would rather collect experiences than stuff. Don’t put something in storage for them. Save the fees and give them the cash to purchase what they want when they want it.
  • Make sure there’s a spot for the furniture you’re thinking of taking to your smaller space. Also, consider your storage space and pack accordingly. That lace tablecloth may have sentimental value but do you have the space to store it? Will you ever use it again?

Finally, I’d advise you to “always use the good stuff.” Don’t save it. Get rid of the old towels, sheets, dishes, placemats, etc. Use the ones you’ve set aside for “special occasions.” This time of your life is “a special occasion.” Get rid of clutter and surround yourself with what you love the most.

Good luck with your move!


Mershon Niesner is a Certified Life Coach and author of “Mom’s Gone, Now What? Ten Steps to Help Daughters Move Forward After Mother Loss” which is available on Amazon; also, locally at Sunshine Booksellers and Keep In Touch. For more information visit Email your coaching questions to: Your identity will be kept strictly confidential.

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How To Stop Being A Perfectionist & The Downsides To Being One

Depending on who you ask, people may consider perfectionism to be a strength or a weakness.

Throughout my time as an excellence-seeking perfectionist (meaning I have a high level of standards for myself and the people in my life), I have found that being perfect isn’t a strength, it’s a weakness.

It’s important to have a reality check with yourself and learn how to stop being a perfectionist — it’s not good for your mental health!

Is perfectionism a mental disorder?

While perfectionism itself isn’t recognized as a mental disorder, people who struggle with perfectionism oftentimes experience comorbid mental health issues. If you’re struggling with anxiety, depression, or eating disorders, perfectionist thoughts could make those illnesses worsen.

The other kind of perfectionists (failure-avoiding) are concerned with their own desire to succeed for fear of not being good enough in the eyes of others.

Perfectionist tendencies can cause you to not be able to achieve your goals, practice negative self-talk, and have too high standards.

RELATED: The Types Of Perfectionists That Have Existed Across Generations

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How To Process The Death Of Someone Who Negatively Affected Your Life

How To Process The Death Of Someone Who Negatively Affected Your Life

Grief is a process that’s highly personal and unknowable until you’re in it.

And though experts say there’s no right or wrong way to mourn someone, when the person who died is someone you had conflicted feelings about ― say, a toxic parent, or an ex-spouse with whom you begrudgingly co-parented for years ― it’s easy to feel like you’re doing it wrong.

“When this type of grief shows up with clients, they are confused and not sure what to do with how they feel,” said Michelle Chalfant, a licensed therapist and holistic life coach based in Nashville, Tennessee. “They want guidance on how to navigate their emotions — or lack thereof — around the loss.”

Chalfant described a client she once had who came in for help after her abusive, narcissistic mother died. The woman, an only child now in her 40s, had distanced herself from her mom over the years out of self-preservation. Upon her mother’s death, the client felt an odd mix of feelings: sadness because it was her mother who died, but also gratitude that the abuse would cease.

“I have seen children come to funerals who haven’t seen their parents in decades. I’ve tried to convince others to come and just be present, and they refused.”

– Jennifer Kaluzny, a rabbi at Temple Israel in West Bloomfield, Michigan

“She felt ashamed to feel this way and wanted clarity on if she was a ‘bad person’ for, on some level, being happy about the abuse ending,” Chalfant said. “She also needed help processing the death of the relationship she hoped to cultivate with her mom one day.”

More than anything, the woman was looking for validation in her disparate emotions.

“That’s a common theme with people in this type of scenario,” Chalfant said. “They wonder how they ‘should’ be feeling, but the truth is, there is no particular feeling they should feel. It’s unique to each person experiencing grief.”

Jennifer Kaluzny, a rabbi at Temple Israel in West Bloomfield, Michigan, thinks the experience is so difficult because it reopens old wounds ― including some that you may believe have already healed. You may have already worked through trauma that you attribute to your estranged sister, for instance, but now that she’s gone, it crops up again uninvited.

“Unfortunately many families have significant tension or an estrangement,” Kaluzny told HuffPost. “I have seen children come to funerals who haven’t seen their parents in decades. I’ve tried to convince others to come and just be present, and they refused.”

These issues frequently surface when parents die. If abuse, abandonment or extreme favoritism of another child were present in someone’s childhood, a grown child isn’t always looking to honor the person who was the source of that deep hurt.

“Many choose a ritual of their own and perform it surrounded by people who love and support them instead,” Kaluzny said.

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It’s important to stay curious and have no preconceived notions about what you think you “should” feel, therapist Michelle Chalfant said.

For those who choose to attend the funeral, though, Kaluzny tells them they can participate — or not — in whatever parts of the service they wish.

I am very open with the families I serve, and I let them know that they can share what they wish, and we can highlight the good, and downplay or not even mention the bad,” she said.

Clearly, this is knotty, complicated stuff. If you’re in this position right now, we have some advice from grief experts like Kaluzny on how to deal with your feelings.

Double up on the self-compassion.

There’s a strong cultural taboo against speaking ill of the dead, largely because they can’t defend themselves. If you feel relief that someone is gone, or you can’t help reflecting on the not-so-wonderful parts about the person, it’s easy to be self-critical.

Instead of doing that, cut yourself some slack, said M. Katherine Shear, a professor of psychiatry at Columbia University and the founding director of the Center for Complicated Grief at the Columbia School of Social Work. It’s really OK to have minimal or absent grief, or even to feel relief when someone who hurt you has died.

“Treat yourself with compassion,” Shear told HuffPost. “Most of us, even those of us who show compassion to others, have a hard time treating ourselves kindly and recognizing that emotional pain is a universal human experience. When we judge ourselves negatively, it only adds to the pain of a difficult experience like this.”

Slow down, breathe and check in with yourself.

When we have unpleasant emotions, we often try to busy ourselves to avoid the feelings. In the immediate moment ― say, after hearing the news of the person’s death ― give yourself permission to feel everything, and slow down and make time for yourself, Chalfant said.

“When we take the time to slow down, emotions tend to rise up, which is a good thing here,” she said. “Deep, slow breathing helps as well. Breath helps to move emotions. If you feel wound up or stressed, go for a walk or just sit quietly and check in with how you are feeling.”

Staying curious, and having no preconceived notions about what you think you should be feeling, is also beneficial when checking in with yourself, she said.

"We need to remember to go at our own pace [with grief], not compare our process to others,” Chalfant said.
“We need to remember to go at our own pace [with grief], not compare our process to others,” Chalfant said.

Don’t compare your grief to other people’s.

While you might not even be sure you want to attend your dad’s funeral, your brother, who dealt with the same haranguing and mean-spirited comments growing up, may be eager to speak at the service ― even reverentially, about the good parts of the man. You have to be OK with that. Grief is personal, and it will do you no favors to compare your grief with someone else’s or judge them for their response, Chalfant said.

“We need to remember to go at our own pace, not compare our process to others,” she said. “Taking care of yourself and tending to your specific needs is always important, but especially when you are tending to the wounds of grief.”

Find a way to express your feelings, like through journaling.

It’s important to find a way to tap into your feelings and thoughts, whether it’s talking to a therapist (here’s a helpful guide on how to find affordable counseling), talking to a close friend, expressing it through a beloved creative hobby, or journaling.

“Journaling can be a gateway into our grief and emotions,” Chalfant said. “When we take a pen to paper and begin to write, our inside feelings are able to move through us and onto paper. It’s very cathartic and an easy tool to use with grief.”

To begin, ask yourself what you’re feeling. If you feel numb, write about it, Chalfant said. If you feel sad, write about it. If it feels like you’re going long on either subject ― dwelling on the good, or dwelling on the bad ― don’t feel like you have to balance it out by writing more about what you “should” feel.

“With journaling, it’s a personal experience, and anything and everything you write is perfect,” Chalfant said. “You can’t get it wrong.”

Journaling can be a particularly cathartic way to deal with complicated grief.

Dianne Avery Photography via Getty Images

Journaling can be a particularly cathartic way to deal with complicated grief.

Better yet, write a letter to the person you lost.

When working with people in mourning, Kaluzny occasionally suggests they write a letter to their loved one and not send it. Say everything you would have said if they were standing right in front of you, she tells them. This exercise works particularly well if you’re dealing with complicated, seemingly-at-odds emotions.

“Some people say it’s a very cathartic experience,” Kaluzny said.

Be OK with experiencing “absent grief.”

It’s almost always helpful to give a name to something we’re experiencing. What you may be going through right now could be “absent grief.”

According to the American Psychological Association, “absent grief” is a form of “complicated grief in which a person shows no, or only a few, signs of distress about the death of a loved one. This pattern of grief is thought to be an impaired response resulting from denial or avoidance of the emotional realities of the loss.”

With absent grief, the emotional states we (rightly or wrongly) associate with mourning ― denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance ― may never manifest, or may manifest much later on, even years down the line.

“Absent grief is something that I think many people experience over time,” Kaluzny said. “They realize that they can live their life again and it doesn’t hurt so badly ― then, all of a sudden, it strikes when you least expect it.”

Grief is sly that way, she said.

“You could feel fine, even right after the death, and then you are standing at the grocery store and you see your loved one’s favorite ice cream and you fall to your knees in the frozen food section,” Kaluzny said. “It’s entirely normal.”

Need help? In the U.S., call 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) for the National Domestic Violence Hotline.

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Francesca, a Romanian life coach based in the US has revealed five tips and trick to make sure you're the most attractive person in the room

Life coach reveals how be the most attractive person from talking slowly to rocking wet hair  

A life coach has revealed five ‘psychology tips’ that she says will make you appear like attractive person in the room – from talking slowly to sporting wet hair, the life coach ensures her tips will have everyone’s eyes on you. 

Coach Francesca, who is based in the US, but originally from Romania, studied psychology at at City University in London, and regularly makes headlines with her psychology tips, which she shares with her 1.1 million followers on TikTok. 

In one of her most recent videos, Francesca shared a number of tips which she says will make people find you attractive. 

Francesca, a Romanian life coach based in the US has revealed five tips and trick to make sure you’re the most attractive person in the room

Use your hands when you talk to appear more confident

In her video, which racked up over 162,000 views, Francesca told her followers to use their hands when they talk because it makes them seem ‘more confident.’ 

The first tip she gave her over 1.1 million followers was to use their hands when they talk because it makes them appear 'more confident and engaging'

The first tip she gave her over 1.1 million followers was to use their hands when they talk because it makes them appear ‘more confident and engaging’

She added that when using hand gestures you seem ‘more engaging.’ 

Talking with your hands is said to make you appear more charismatic and  implies higher levels of energy and attraction. 

Research has shown that people who talk with their hands are seen as warm, passionate, energetic and welcoming, while those don’t use hand gestures are seen as cold and closed off. 

Body language experts have even examine certain hand gestures that make you appear most attractive and confident. 

One hand gesture that often attracts people is when you have your palms facing up at a 45 degree angle and  your fingers lightly spread apart. 

This hand gesture signifies you’re open and honest, which allows others to gravitate to you more.

Studies have also shown that talking with your hands makes your more liked and encourages people to listen to you more.  

Rock a wet-hair look to ramp up your attractiveness

Francesca’s next tip was to ‘keep your hair wet.’ 

The Romanian life coach added: ‘For some reason we tend to rate people with wet hair as more attractive.’ 

In recent years the wet hair look has become something to embrace rather than something to hide from. 

Whether you’re coming out of the shower or pool, if you’re hair is wet, you’re sure to catch the attention of everyone around you. 

Her next tip was to 'keep your hair wet,' which she noted was because people tend to 'rate people with wet hair as more attractive'

Kim Kardashian sported wet hair, causing everyone to follow at the 2019 Met Gala

Her next tip was to ‘keep your hair wet,’ a look popularized by celebrities like Kim Kardashian (right), saying people tend to ‘rate people with wet hair as more attractive’

Kim Kardashian proved the wet hair look could look seductive in 2019 Met Gala dress, which looked like it was dripping with water. and sported with soaking wet hair. 

Furthermore the wet hair look can make you appear more attractive because boasts both glamour and edge. 

The effortless hairstyle is said to give a naturally sexy look with no little to no work, so next time you get out of the shower, feel free to ditch the hair dryer if you want to catch the attention of others.

The life coach added that talking slowly helps you come across as 'confident'

The life coach added that talking slowly helps you come across as ‘confident’

Ignite passion by talking slowly  

The third tip the life coach shared was to ‘take your time when you talk.’ 

She added: ‘Take breaks and talk slowly,

‘Rushing makes you come across as insecure, while taking your time makes you seem relaxed and confident.’ 

There are many benefits of talking slowly including having more control, feeling more relaxed and feeling more steady. 

When you speak slowly not only do those listening to you have an easier time processing your words, but you also give your words more weight and power, which makes you appear more knowledgeable and confident. 

Talking slowly inspires passion and evokes more emotion among others, which helps you come across as more attractive. 

Speaking slowly is also said to win anyone over by charming them with your passion and confidence. 

Francesca added enjoying yourself will attract people towards you

Francesca added enjoying yourself will attract people towards you 

Smile authentically and have warm body language 

‘Just enjoying yourself and having a good time makes people come to you like a magnet,’ said the Romanian life coach. 

It’s often said that you are what you attract, in other words what comes to you is a reflection of you.

When you are happy and enjoying your life, people gravitate towards you because they are similar in nature and because they want to be you. 

This carefree attitude brings pulls people towards you and attracts them right away. 

If someone sees you genuinely happy, they can’t help but to pull themselves towards you, in hopes of attracting the same attitude or having someone around them who they can look towards when they struggle to authentically enjoy themselves. 

Try to embrace your own sensual energy 

The final tip Francesca gives her followers is to have ‘sensual energy.’ 

‘This means feeling good in your own skin and letting your sexual energy flow in your body.’

Having sensual energy was her final tip, which meant 'letting your sexual energy flow'

Having sensual energy was her final tip, which meant ‘letting your sexual energy flow’

Although many people think of sex when they hear the words ‘sensual energy,’ it actually plays a role in many aspects of life, not just sex. 

When you learn to accept yourself for you who you are, you begin to create sensual energy. 

This energy evokes powerful emotions and makes you seem more confident, which helps pull people towards you. 

Learning how to create and harness this sensual energy can help you become more creative and tackle big goals and projects.

This level of ambition and success make people gravitate to you and find you more attractive. 

The life coach noted that sensual energy can be built by accepting yourself for the way you are and being genuinely happy. 

The aura that comes along with harnessing sensual energy will cause everyone in the room to never take their eyes off you. 

The life coach's video gained over 21,000 likes with many users praising her for her tips, while others joked they already had these tips down

The life coach’s video gained over 21,000 likes with many users praising her for her tips, while others joked they already had these tips down

In the past, Francesca has given her followers helpful tips like how to make anyone like you – which include asking them to do you a favor, using the person’s name when speaking,  giving compliments and mirroring their body language and tone of voice. 

She even shared ways to secretly know if your crush liked you back, which included your crush not making eye contact, sliding their hand down your arm and if they stand up straight. 

The life coach’s video gained over 21,000 likes with many users praising her for her tips, while others joked they already had these tips down. 

‘Thank you dear,’ said one user.

Another user added: ‘Oily hair count?’ 

‘Good to know,’ commented another user.

‘Hahaha do all these things including greasy hair,’ wrote another user.  

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"Show Up Positive" ($15.99) by Rita Ernst is available at Carmichael's Bookstore and Amazon.

Try these 3 tips to ‘Show Up Positive’ and find job satisfaction

Even if you’ve stayed with your current job since the onset of the coronavirus pandemic in 2020, the unprecedented churn in the U.S. labor market over the past two and a half years may have you thinking, “am I happy where I am?”

If so, you’re not alone.

“For the better part of a century, we have accepted whatever terms and conditions companies put in front of us,” said Louisville-based executive coach and organizational psychologist Rita Ernst. “The pandemic threw everything up in the air and gave us the ability to scrutinize our jobs, which we were not doing before, simply out of habit.”

As the nation’s “quit rate” reached a 20-year high last November, experts started referring to the phenomenon as “The Great Resignation.” According to the Pew Research Center, about one-in-five non-retired U.S. adults (19%) — including similar shares of men (18%) and women (20%) — say they quit a job at some point in 2021, meaning they left by choice and not because they were fired, laid off or because a temporary job had ended.

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A Chicago Life Coach Offers Personal Coaching, Career And Relationships Coaching

A Chicago Life Coach Offers Personal Coaching, Career And Relationships Coaching

“#1 Chicago Life Coach, Mr. Frank Corday”

Learn about Frank Corday, one’s best choice for a Chicago life coach offering peace, resolution, and relationships coaching as well as strategic and personal life coaching services.

Provided one is on the verge of seeking a Chicago life coach, keep reading to learn about Mr. Frank Corday’s unique approach to helping one find and get in a new direction.

Believe it or not, the ‘New Year’ is not the only time of the year people think about resolutions, goals, and intentions for a better life, and provided one is like many of the people we’ve met, one may not even know where to start when it comes to setting and achieving goals for yourself – whether it be professional, personal, or financial goals.

Or one might be great at planning goals but does not have a successful track record for achieving them.

If this sounds familiar one may want to consider life coaching in Chicago to support one in plotting the future, overcoming your personal challenges, and helping to keep you on track.

It’s no secret that people need support to thrive in life and a life coach can assist and encourage one without passing judgment or feigning interest. Life coaches help one perform at the fullest potential professionally, personally, and financially – such as helping one with relationships, careers, health goals, communication skills, debt, and spirituality.

This Chicago life coach offers the tools necessary for achieving goals.

Part of a life coach’s job will be helping one figure out what has been holding one back or getting in one’s way of success, and then they help one to push past whatever that is.

They are often experienced in overcoming obstacles and achieving results themselves, and they use their learned experience to help others do the same.

Working with a life coach in Chicago,  can be an easy and convenient option because most offer sessions over the phone or online if in-person sessions are not feasible.

At first, your sessions might be more frequent or longer as your coach gets to know you better and you may be asked clarifying questions meant to uncover any hidden information or deep desires before real help is offered to help one clarify goals and set a structured plan in place for achieving those goals.

After some initial progress has been made, one’s sessions might be less frequent whereas life coaching in Chicago, will support one in staying on a path to success, holding one accountable, and giving one an extra push when one needs it.

They will support and celebrate with one, every milestone, no matter how small.

Still not convinced that one should work with a Chicago life coach?

Here are four reasons why one may consider coaching with Mr. Frank Corday:

1. Coaching provides clarity and direction.

The first thing a life coach is going to want to do is better understand what one wants.

Sometimes one may know exactly what one wants in life, and other times no idea.

If one is feeling a sense of unhappiness or dissatisfaction and can’t quite put a name to it, life coaching in Chicago can help.

Clarity involves being clear about who one is and living a life that is meaningful and purposeful.

It means knowing what one wants, why one wants it, and how one can go about getting it.

Life coaching in Chicago is a process that can help one uncover gifts and talents and discover what gives life meaning.

There may be blind spots or hidden gems below the surface that one is unable to uncover alone.

With the help of a coach, clarity and direction can unfold, leading one to a fulfilling, intentionally satisfying life.

2. Life coaching in Chicago helps with goal setting.

Setting personal goals is not always easy, and long-term goals can be particularly difficult to visualize.

One may be used to setting goals in the near term but setting up goals and understanding where one wants to be in the future is extremely valuable. For some people, this can be a daunting and anxiety-inducing task.

Life coaching in Chicago can guide one through the process of setting goals by helping one understand immediate and future wants and needs.

They can provide leading questions that can help one to discover something profound about themselves and what one wants out of life. They can also help one stay organized and make a plan to get results.

Sometimes the hardest part of achieving goals is to make a plan that is realistic and if one’s plan is overly ambitious, one might get discouraged and sideswiped from the journey.

A good Chicago life coach will make sure each step in one’s plan is attainable and specific enough so that one is crystal clear on what is needed to do and by when one needs to do it.

3. Life coaching provides unbiased feedback and support.

Unlike a friend or family member, one’s Chicago life coach is there to help in one’s personal growth journey by giving true and honest feedback, free of any bias.

Chicago life coaching will focus on providing input that will lead to overall goals rather than simply trying to make one feel better (or sway one towards their personal agenda). Their advice will also be backed by relevant professional life experience gained from helping others with similar goals and they will be one’s biggest cheerleaders, celebrating every milestone on one’s journey and firmly putting one back on track when swerved astray.

In the process of utilizing life coaching in Chicago, one will most likely be pushed to learn more about themselves than one would have normally. One will be asked questions one may not have thought of and provide a deeper insight into one’s life and aspirations.

Here are just a few personal areas they can help improve:

  • Work performance
  • Relationships
  • Work-life balance
  • Time management
  • Communication skills

Additionally, by helping one become more successful at meeting goals and sticking to a plan, one will inherently become more confident in oneself and the journey.

4. A Chicago life coach holds one accountable!

Let’s be honest, one might not reach one’s goals as often (or as quickly) as they would like—whether it be because one loses motivation, has trouble prioritizing, has limiting beliefs, or simply gets distracted by the ins and outs of life.

Hiring a life coach will help to ensure one gets back on track if and when one falters or feels a lack of confidence.

Accountability is important to achieving one’s dreams and goals.

It means one is being held responsible for one’s own success and rather than seeing it as a burden or added stress, see accountability as a sense of ownership and pride over one’s life.

When one shares goals out loud with a life coach, one will be held accountable for the goals and are more likely to make them a priority and achieve the goals, so they don’t let their accountability partner down.

Whatever one’s reason for choosing to work with a Chicago life coach, consider working with Life Coach, Frank Corday!

Media Contact
Company Name: Ready Coach Act, LLC
Contact Person: Coach Frank Corday
Email: Send Email
Phone: (773) 373-9523
City: Chicago
State: Illinois
Country: United States

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